Dear Sir...

• To start...  the world is not a merry place.  Australia is, undoubtedly, more merry than some locations, (such as sub-saharan Africa) however, I feel there is room for improvement (and not the Jamie Durie sort).
• Something has to be done about Alexander Downer.  That man is a liability; in the interests of the entire country he shouldn't be allowed to talk, let alone go overseas and talk to people about our international affairs.  I could rant on this for a while, but for now...
• If our international interests, (such as embassies) are under threat, (by things like bombs) that is a fair indication that people don't like us.  Rather than saddling up with big strong people, (and this is just a suggestion) wouldn't it make more sense to find out WHY we are disliked and try to fix it?  That said, I do realise that 'terrorists' are evil, crazy and 'we hates them', but their presence suggests that their may, (MAY) be a problem.
• Lay it straight: stop making people paranoid.  Paranoia makes for stuffed up people.  Stuffed up people make for a crap country.
• Don't make an idiot of yourself.  Grinning ear-to-ear whilst rocking and repeating a stupid line as an attempts to disregard a question just makes you look like a fool (also a little like one of those clowns whose mouths you put ping-pong balls in).  It's painful.
• Jazz up politics.  We want to see themed campaign launches that we can follow weekly on channel ten, compare, and then sms our verdicts.  We want lights, colour, EXCITEMENT!  We are the Australian public and it is YOUR job to meet our desires!  Next term, the vote will not be between 'Howard' and 'Latham', it will be between 'Monkey Magic' and 'the Hulk' ...or similar.  In this way, we don't have to like you, (and trust me, we don't) we just have to judge your performance ...after all, I thought that was what this democratic election sh'bang was all about...
• I'd like to finish by paraphrasing one politician, (at least) that made my day... "The Greens...  are like watermelons.  They may be green on the outside, but they're very, very RED on the inside."